


A Soldier's Love

by XxstrifexX, Yuki_Kiryuu



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Feels, M/M, Slight Smut, Soldier! Levi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-10
Updated: 2013-10-10
Packaged: 2017-12-29 00:10:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/998542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XxstrifexX/pseuds/XxstrifexX, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yuki_Kiryuu/pseuds/Yuki_Kiryuu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>based on the drawings of Rovescio92's drawings A soldiers call home. </p><p>http://rovescio92.tumblr.com/post/63055926895/erenxrivaillelove-rovescio92<br/> my longest oneshot ever! </p><p>thank you xoxStrifexox for helping with the smilut and the other areas!</p><p> Please enjoy everyone!!</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Soldier's Love

The day I met Levi was the best day of my life. Sure he was rude, blunt and looked like he had a permanent scowl on his face. I had accidentally ran into him on my way home. What drew me to him was his eyes, the perfect ivory skin, and the way his hair moved in the wind. I would say I had been getting a warm feeling in my chest that radiated through my whole being. I assumed it was love at first sight. I know what a cheesy thing to believe right? 

But as the days went by, we became very close. It took me almost a month to finally break through his hard exterior. We started hanging out more, and I swear I couldn't have been happier. My friends and family began to see a change in me. I was happier than I've been in years since my best friend Armin died of cancer two years ago. The bad part, now don't get me wrong, was that they wanted to meet the person responsible for my happiness. The bad part was that they all believed that Levi was my boyfriend. Even after I tried to tell them that we were just friends, they wouldn't belive me. Some family huh?

Three months later, I confessed to Levi. I can still remember it because it was the next most happiest moment since I met him.

"Levi?" I asked, while we were watching a movie, my hands nervously fumbling on my lap.

"Yes brat?" He said, still glued to the movie that they were watching.

God, I was nervous. Here I am, going to confess to him. Did he even like me that way? Was he even gay? Would he reject me? 

These thoughts were plauging me as I tried to work up the courage.

"Levi, I--I love you." 

What happened next took me by surprise. I was getting nervous. It had been five minutes since I had confessed. Oh god, what if he rejects me? Will our friendship end? Will I be able to handle it? If he doesn't say something soon I'm gonna leave. The second I was getting up from the couch to leave, tears slipping down my cheeks. I couldn't take it anymore.

"What?" I asked, my voice cracking from the sadness and tears.

"I love you too, Eren."

Wait, did I hear that right? "Sorry, what did you say?" 

"I said I love you too brat." 

I almost died. I was happy now that my feelings were returned. I leaned over and kissed him, the feeling of his tounge fighiting mine for dominance was so good I moaned into his mouth. I moved my hands to embrace him pulling him in to the kiss deeper. I threaded on hand through his hair the other rubbing the undershave. I couldn't describe how it felt, but I felt complete and it felt like my whole being was drowning in him. We broke apart only for a split second, only to remove our clothing. Levi pulled me into another intoxicating kiss and I melted when he moved to suckle my neck, nibbling on my ear. I moaned again, feeling such desire I couldn't contain anymore. 

I gasped as his tongue traced down my neck trailing over my chest stopping at my nipples. I moaned and arched my back to the sensation. His hands traced over my body, tongue distracting me from their true goal. I wasn't aware he began stripping me from my pants until I felt him tug them down to my knees. I moaned as his hand palmEd me through my boxers, lips trailing down to replace his hand. Trying to keep my eyes open, I watched as he mouthed my erection. Hot moist puffs of air filtering through the cotton fabric, leaving it moist and myself in complete ecstasy.

His mouth found the hem of my boxer briefs and his eyes caught mine, a silent question of whether or not he could continue. A gasp caught in my throat, the consideration he showed me to wait for my approval warming my heart. With a nod and 'yes Levi please' I gave myself up to him completely.

We got married a year later. It was the happiest day of my existance. I was bound eternally to the one person I would love forever. A few days later, I was still basking in the man who was my husband, both tangled in each others limbs, sharing passionate kisses, and looking lovingly in each others eyes. 

We we're interrupted by Levi's phone ringing. I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomache. I knew it wasn't good, whatever was being said, because I watched him go from smiling to serious. When he got off the phone, my stomache began twisting in anxious knots, making me feel nauseated. 

Levi was a soldier, and he was about to retire in a couple months. He had tried to put my fears at ease, because he didn't have to go anywhere. We got married because he was retiring and he didn't want me to go through the pain of being a soldiers significant other. I felt better about that, that I wouldn't have to live in constant fear of getting a visit saying he had died. 

This phone call was different, because Levi's whole attitude and demeanor changed. I wanted to know what was going on and to find out if my worse fears were finnally coming to light. My happy attitude slowly started to melt away replaced by sadness and anxiety.

"I have to report back to base." He said. "I'm sorry Eren, but I have to go for another tour."

I felt my heart shatter. 'How could this happen? Now of all times?'

"Why? You promised you weren't going to leave me."

I was to afraid to voice my fears, I didn't want to argue, but it wasn't fair. Why, with only two months left, why were they taking him away from me?

"I'm sorry. I'll be gone for almost a year. I know it's going to be painful, and I promise I won't die."

He pulled me into a hug, and I curled up, snuggling my head into the crook of his neck, breathing him in I tried to take comfort in his smell. His arms enveloped me in his warmth, and I couldn't imagine not being able to feel, touch, hear his voice, see him, for a full year. 

"When are you leaving?"

"In two days. So can we spend it alone, just like this?"

"Of course, we won't leave this house for the next two days." I said, pulling him close to me and placed a needy kiss on his lips. 

"I'll make sure you can't walk, so you can remember it and think of nothing else but me."

We made love like we never did before, making sure we gave each other everything we had, more love and feelings than before. I didn't think it was possible to give someone everything you had, to fully love them body heart and soul.

The fateful day arrived, and I couldn't stop crying. I couldn't believe just three days ago I was cuddling with my husband with absolutely no care in the world. How could I live without seeing him for a whole year? Sometimes I wish he never became a soldier. I wouldn't have to be scared or anxious everytime he left, going through sevre depression, sleeping in clothes that has his smell imprinted on it. It was a hard life being a soldires spouse, I was proud of him because he was in the military and the Army gave us a comfortable life, I was grateful for that but at the same time I hated it.

I was crying the whole way to the airport. I didn't want him to go. my perfect loving husband, looked so good in his uniform. The fatigues adorned all his various metals, along with his rank badges on. I knew I was being selfish and I didn't care. 

I clung to him as we were walking into the airport. I felt that if I didn't he would disappear to soon. I was crying again I was sobbing like a child, and I couldn't help it. Levi and I had barely spent any time apart since we've been together. How was I supposed to live with out him for a whole fucking year?

As they were calling levis flight for boarding, I didn't want to let go of him. my family was there, to see Levi off as well, even my mom was crying probably was because she could see I was in so much pain.

"Levi please... d--dont leave!" I exclaimed my wordds stuttering. My heart felt like I was losing him already. How was I going to live with out him?

"Eren I don't want to go either, but I can't disobey my orders. Please don't cry baby."

I latched onto hos lips and kissed him so desperately. Our tounges were dancing together and I felt so broken. I broke the hiss still donning as he cupped my cheeeks and I looked into his eyes and rested my forhead to his. 

We finally broke apart from hugging as the final boarding call was announced. My heart shattered more. i diddnt want him to let go of my hand so we walked up to the gate. He handed the attendant his ticket. We embraced and kissed one last time. 

"I love you so much Levi. Please come home safe." My heart was breaking and I was beside myself. How could I go on without him?

"God, Eren I love you so much. I'll miss you and ill call as soon as I can."

I felt a sense of panic wash over me as he let go of my hand and began walking down the terminal and dissapeared from view. I crumpled to the floor, and sobbed. My mom ran to me and helped me up, clutching me securely in a hug and we cried together as his plane taxied down the runway and disappeared into the sky.

 

[Two months later]

 

I was doing somewhat better, but was still depressed. I've been staying at my parents off and on. My mom was so supportive, It would've made levi so happy. I had no way of contacting Levi because where he was he didn't have signal or internet. 

I was missing him so much, but I was proud of him and talked about him all the time. I had began to attend a support group of sorts for families of military. There were other couples, gay and straight that were very supportive. We met often and talked about out husbands or wives and parents in the military. It was because of this support group I've been keeping myself from falling apart completly. 

One day I was out shopping cause mom and Mikasa were making my favorite comfort foods. I was spending the weekends home and I felt happy. I never thought my family would be so supportive of us and his career. 

I was walking through the aisles looking for the ingredients mom listed for the hot pot she wanted to make, when my phone rang. It surprised me because not many people called me besides mom and Mikasa, so I answered it.

"Yes mom did you---" I was cut off by a voice I never thought is hear for a year. My heart swelled and my breath was becoming shaky as I inhaled.

"Eren." 

"Levi!" I almost started sobbing in the aisle. "I miss you so much! How are you?"

"I miss you too babe, you have no idea." He sighed heavily over the phone. "I don't have long, I'm driving back to the barracks. I just wanted to say I love you."

"I love you too so much." I wanted to just curl up on the floor right there. I never thought I would hear his voice so soon.

"Hey Eren, can I call you back? I can't talk while I'm driving." 

"Oh of course. I love you."

"I love you too."

I drove home fast as I could, but not breaking the speed limit. I dropped the groceries on the counter in the kitchen and took off to my room. not even five minutes later my phone rang. It was a text.

 

Levi <3: Get on Skype right now. I wanna see you.

Eren: oh okay.

I literally tripped on my own feet rushing to my laptop and turned it on. Almost immediately, I received a notification that I was receiving a voice chat invite.

"Damn, its so good to see you babe. I miss you everyday." Levi said, grinning that gorgeous smile only I see.

"I think about you all the time even when I shower. I dream about you all the time."

I felt the air around me tense and I was getting depressed again. I had a feeling Levi knew how much I missed him, and how anxious and afraid I was to lose him.

"Please come home Levi. I miss you so much." I said looking into his eyes, tears streaming down my cheeks. I was in so much pain, and it hurt.

"I know but I can't yet. Shit I have to go babe. I love you so much." I could see tears also streaming down his cheeks as well. 

"I love you and miss you too. Please be safe." I said placing my hand on the screen like I was stroking his cheek. I saw him go offline and I sobbed at my desk for what felt like forever before I was called for dinner.

I had no idea that would be the last time I would ever speak to levi again.

 

[Three Months Later]

 

I was curled up on the couch, cuddled up to my mom. We were watching a movie when a knock was heard. I told mom I would get it and got up and walked to the door, opening it with a smile. Who I saw standing on the porch, somber and dressed I'm military uniforms. My face fell and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

"Are you Eren Yeager?" The unknown soldier asked.

"Yes, why do you want to know?" I could feel my heart starting to crumble over the uneasy feeling surrounding me.

"I'm sorry son, but were here to tell you that your husband Captain Levi Yeager was killed in action yesterday. Were truly sorry."

"Wait, is this some kind of joke?" I asked, not wanting to accept what I think they just said. He can't be dead, not my strong soldier, my husband.

"I'm very sorry for your loss. His remains are on the way here. It will be here tomorrow. Again I'm very sorry and we offer our condolences."

They turned and left. I stood at the door for what seemed like forever before I slumped down on the floor, my hand on the closed door and I was sobbing uncontrollably. 

Why did you leave me all alone Levi? Why did you have to shatter my heart? Didn't you promise me you wouldn't die?

 

[One Week Later]

 

The military was very nice in helping with getting Levi's affairs in order. They helped with the funeral and were very supportive in my decisons. 

I also wasn't aware of the hefty insurance policy he had left behind. It was enough for me to live comfortably for practically the rest of my life.

The day of his funeral came and I was a shattered broken man. I was so numb from crying everyday. I didn't want to be here, because it will be over the second his coffin would disappear into the ground. 

We had an open casket, because I wanted to kiss him once more and caress his cheek; I wanted to tell him I would be ok and that I miss him and I will always love him.

I screamed and cried as they handed me the flag and his buttons and metals. I accepted tearfully, and watched as my first and only love was lowered out of sight, lost to me forever. I would never love anyone as much as I loved him and would probably never love again.

 

[One Year Later]

 

"Hey babe I miss you so fucking much. I know I should move on, but I can't. I can't fucking do it. Everyone misses you even mom. We talk about you all the time. We watched our wedding video so much that we had to have the DVD fixed. Well I have to go babe, I'll see you in a couple days. I love you Levi."

I got in my car and drove home, falling apart after I pulled in the driveway of my moms house I broke down in the car. Sure I've tried to move on, but I really couldn't. I went in and went to my room and grabbed his picture and fell asleep cradling it while I was curled up in his old t-shirt that I sprayed his cologne on everyday.

 

I would never love anyone like I loved Levi ever again.


End file.
